I have a beef with pool life guards. Honestly how many lives do these people save? It isn't as though we are dealing with the ocean here. Chances are most emergencies would be solved by, oh, standing up? It seems to me all they do is hassle pool goers. "No running, no rough housing and for god's sake stay off the rope!"
Quiet you corpulent knob. I mock you and your whistle.
I believe there should be a testing for all pool goers. Pass a certain level of water proficiency and from there forward life guards are not even permitted to look at you. And they should never be allowed to speak to anyone under any circumstance. Scoop out the barely living, ship them to the hospital and let us all be.
Actually the best idea would be an 18 and over pool, one guard. Watching over people furthers their lack of personal responsibility.
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